Lazy Man's Risotto

If necessity is the mother of all invention then laziness is the father. A necessity born of hunger, to feed the body, to eat and ultimately sustain existence. Lacking experience and skill in the kitchen one is left with only two options. Restaurant or laziness. Laziness prevails. Time and effort. Rice. While time consuming it can be reproduced with minimal effort. Remind yourself you’ve worked a hard day. Rice. Pot. Water. Stove. While not necessary some flavour is desirable. Chicken stock cube will suffice. Wait. Scratch oneself. Cooking rice depends on three equally important factors. Experience. Knowledge of available equipment. And luck. One seems to always neglect to show itself. Rice becomes gluggy. Retains moisture. Never the less, survival is the key here. Must eat. Need nutrients. Serve with bread. Not enough. Needs more. Tomato sauce will not do. Parmesan. Perfect. Apply liberally. Taste. Lazy Man’s Risotto is born.

A week passes with incident. People live, die, cry and fly. They come, they go. But the same necessity remains. Hunger. This time armed with experience. The lazy man elects the Lazy Man’s Risotto. Same process should equal same deliciousness. It stands to reason that different process could equal different deliciousness. A plan is hatched. Dice Carrots, add to rice with stock. Cook, add parmesan. Consume. Lazy Man’s Risotto just went live.

The lazy and unskilled man has discovered a secret that is too much for him to bear. His mind races. Drunk with the power of creation he sympathises with gods. Like them he too must decide the fates of meals as they pass under his reign. To be delicious or not to be delicious, that is his question. From nothing he created deliciousness. What are the possibilities? Where to next? Add mushrooms. Use white wine. Different rice. Fry bacon, asparagus, ham. Freshly grated parmesan. Herbs and spices and special techniques. Experience lends certain sureness to his hands. Success leaves his hands precise and skilled. Lazy Man’s Risotto just got real.